Sometimes a day has a moment or two that seem to define it — at least until you step back and consider the bigger picture of the day.  Page 223 was like that for me.  The day began early as I’m trying to get back into a school year routine.  Being a Friday, I knew it would be a long day so my plan was to take care of the early morning tasks then get most of the mowing done before taking an afternoon break prior to the evening tasks of getting the building cleaned and ready for Sunday.  The key words in that very long sentence are “my plan”.

The day began as expected with the early morning cleaning and picking up the trash left behind from the previous day.  Once the building was ready for the start of the school day, I turned my attention to a battery issue with our alarm system.  After leaving yet another message with the company that installed the system, and getting no response to any of the messages, I tracked down access to the alarm panel so I could get the details on the battery installed and begin the research to track down a replacement.  It didn’t take long to find a replacement that I could pick up locally by noon, so I ordered the battery then went out to begin the mowing for the day.

Mowing can be relaxing for me, but it can also be a time when I “think too much”.  With school back in session, I try to be more deliberate about where I’m mowing at any given time during the day.  My plan was to mow the outlying areas while school was in session, then mow around the building after school was out for the day.  I began in the ball field and noticed a deer standing in the back corner of the field where she could both watch me and have a quick escape into the woods if she felt threatened.  As I mowed, my mind wandered to how difficult it is being different.  I’ve always been different in a way that doesn’t fit most social models all that well.  Most of the time I’m okay with that, but every once in a while I think it might be nice to actually fit in and belong somewhere — then I remember the sacrifice of conviction that is generally required to do so, and I just can’t bring myself to accepting what I know is wrong just so I can fit in.  With more information readily available now than ever before, I have a better idea regarding the source of my being so different but that doesn’t usually answer the “why?”.  Most of the time I can see how God uses the differences in how my mind processes information to accomplish great things in spite of me, but I also know I carry with me the great pain of rejection often because I don’t have the ability to play the game of social acceptance.  Anyhow, this isn’t where I thought this page would go when I began the writing, so on with the day. 🙂

After getting the ball field mowed, it was time to go pick up the alarm system battery, as well as get fuel for the mower and lunch for me.  Once I was back from running errands, it was back on the mower for the afternoon.  As school was letting out for the day, I took a break and found a message on my answering machine about some options in servicing a piece of equipment that hasn’t been operating well.  After returning that call and ordering the parts we decided would be best for the situation, it was back out to finish the mowing around the building.  I’ve always enjoyed mowing and one of the reasons is the beautiful look that a freshly mowed lawn has.

This really has been a productive day and being reminded of that is one of the reasons that the writing of these pages is important to me.  Without the writing, it is the remainder of the day that tends to stick in my mind yet looking back it was such a small part of the day that it shouldn’t be given as much space in my mind as it wants to take up.  As I set about to begin my Friday evening cleaning and building prep for the weekend, I was warned not to be too shocked at what I would find in parts of the building — that the issues were being addressed and would be taken care of.  As the problems were described, it wasn’t what was actually done that caused my frustration level to rise, but the fact that people were so unwilling to listen and follow very simply and straight-forward instructions.  Anyhow, I knew it wouldn’t do me any good to start cleaning in the state of mind I was in, so I headed out to get some supper and spend some time away from the building to let my mind process the information in a way that would allow me to finish my work for the day.  After eating, I came back to an empty and secure building with lights left on — another one of those little pieces that wanted to define my day.  Even with frustration mounting, the work needed done so I set about taking care of my evening tasks and eventually had the cleaning done and the building ready for Sunday.  Just as in the mowing, there is great satisfaction to be had in looking at the completed task and taking in the sight and smell of freshly cleaned bathrooms and floors.

Today’s photo is one I took late Thursday night as a storm rolled by.  It made me think of the storms of life that I face and how dark they can appear until even a small amount of light illuminates everything.  The storms of life may be dark and powerful but the light of Jesus is brighter and even more powerful than the storms. 

As I reflect on the day, here are some thoughts/lessons that stand out to me:

• When I allow one event to define my entire day I typically have allowed the bigger picture of what God was doing throughout the day to be hidden, or even stolen, from me.
• It is good to have times to think and reflect.
• It is critical to take every thought captive during those times of thinking and reflecting.
• Sometimes being different is a good thing and sometimes it feels like a great burden.
• Being who God created you to be is more important than either being different or fitting in.
• Sometimes a battery has been drained and recharged so much that it no longer functions.  I suspect that we are a lot like that which is why God says that He will put within us a new heart and a new spirit.
• Visible results of work can be very encouraging, but faith is being able to see the results of God’s work even when they are not yet visible.
• I wonder how often my failure to follow simple instructions frustrates others . . . or frustrates God?
• The storms of life will come but the darkness never has the power to overcome the light.
• Even though my mind did not think so as the day ended, it was a very productive day.

Page 222 was a quiet day spent working on equipment maintenance and prayer retreat content ideas as I waited on follow-up from some service work.  As I headed out of the house for work, the moon was shining brightly in the early morning sky so I shot a few photos.  At work I checked on the progress of some maintenance parts I am waiting on and found that they still have not shipped.  I guess that comes from having equipment that is no longer “current model”, so the parts are not stocked at distributors to be able to send out right away and the manufacturers won’t sell them directly.  Sometimes we get so used to immediate access to everything that we want that we forget how to live with patience.  Many times we need to be reminded of the value of waiting — particularly waiting upon the Lord to not only learn from Him, but to be strengthened by Him.

As I worked in the office, I received a phone call from a service tech to let me know he was on his way to look at a piece of cleaning equipment I have that is not working properly.  So, I got the equipment out and ready for him to look at while I waited for him to arrive.  He was able to diagnose the problem, but had to check on part cost and availability when he got back to his office.  After taking care of some small projects in the building and checking on the programming for our HVAC system now that school has resumed, I spent the rest of the day working on prayer retreat content as I waited to learn the equipment repair options and timetable.  As the afternoon melted away with no call, I wrapped up my workday and headed home.

At home I spent more time working on more of the photos from our Upper Peninsula trip and then took my camera outside to try to photograph the hummingbirds.  I did manage a few photos, but they were hesitant to spend a lot of time at the feeder while I was nearby.  While I was watching for the hummingbirds, I took photos of the flowers around the front of the house.  Today’s photo is of one of the roses that are growing along the porch.  It serves as one of many reminders of God’s creativity and beauty that He continually surrounds us with.  Eventually I set the camera on video mode while I went in and ate lunch/dinner.  After I ate and checked on the video, I found that I did have one hummingbird stop by for a minute while I was away.  

As I reflect on the day, here are some thoughts/lessons that stand out to me:

• Even in the twilight of the early morning hours, God hangs reminders of His faithfulness in the sky to be seen by all who would pay attention.
• Patience is a trait that God wants us to learn, but few of us seem to desire it.
• In a society where it seems most things are disposable, we are often too quick to throw out things that still work well.
• Taking the time to maintain what we have is often more cost-effective in both time and money than constantly throwing out replacing.
• Most people seem to be enamored with the new but God calls for us to look for the ancient paths and seek the good ways that we would walk in them.
• The birds of the air seem to be more aware of potential danger than many people are.  We would do well to pay attention to the dangers of temptation that surround us.
• There is rarely a moment or place, if there is any at all, where we can’t find reminders of God’s beauty and creativity if we would only look for it.

The first hour and a half of page 221 was spent finishing the drive home from our Upper Peninsula trip and after a little unwinding, it was finally time to sleep.  Susan was going to need to sleep this morning, so I also slept in a little bit and did an afternoon and evening workday.  While Susan was sleeping, I started my way through the photos from our getaway.  I’ve not made it through all of them yet, but based on what I’ve gone through of them, we packed a lot into a few days — my truck computer says we traveled almost 1400 miles with a little over 26 hours of drive time in the three days we were gone.  We were on “roads” that we were doing good to travel at 5 miles per hour and roads with the speed limit of 75 miles an hour — each one had its purpose and added to the amazing trip.  Today’s photo is one from yesterday as the clouds began to gather over one of the lighthouses we visited.  It made me think of the need for a place of safety and refuge when the storms of life approach.  God has not only called His Son, Jesus, the light of the world, He also says we are to be the light of the world!  How much greater would our church families and communities be if each one of us was a visible beacon of hope and safety to those who find themselves in the midst of a storm?

I thought I would mow this afternoon when I got to work, but I got caught up in messages, maintenance research, and office tasks that kept me busy all afternoon.  All of the tasks seemed to involve things I was ordering or scheduling for later, so progress was made even though it didn’t feel like anything was completed.  By early evening, I went to get something to eat before finishing up my workday with the cleaning and prep so the building is ready for the start of school tomorrow.

As I reflect on the day, here are some thoughts/lessons that stand out to me:

• Some days spill over into the next before they’re done — those often have some of the best memories.
• Sacrificing some sleep for the purpose of making family memories is worth it.
• I’m thankful to have flexibility in the day in regard to what block of hours my workday entails.
• Having an abundance of time to see the beauty of creation that God has surrounded us with is nice, but it is also possible to take in some if it within a limited amount of time.
• We didn’t see everything there was to see, nor everything we would have liked to, but we saw a lot more than we would have if we had decided we didn’t have enough time to even try.
• Jesus is my lighthouse and refuge in times of trouble and in times of peace.
• God wants me to reflect His light to others in their times of trouble and peace as well.
• It is nice to have plans, but it is also good to recognize when things need done that are more important than our plans.

Page 217 has mostly been about rest.  I slept in a little while compared to my usual time to wake up and began the day with a cup of coffee and the writing of yesterday’s page.  That writing used a lot of words, so perhaps today’s page will be a bit shorter. 🙂  It usually takes a bit longer to write the day’s page when I wait until the next morning, so the morning was nearly over by the time I finished writing.  I spent a little time updating my online presence before Susan decided it was time for her to wake up.   Once she was awake and ready for the day, I went outside to see what I could photograph.  A few of the hummingbirds were out and fairly active, so I got some photos of them.  

By noon, it was time to fire up the pellet grill for the Saturday bacon cheeseburgers.  While I waited on it, I wandered the front yard taking pictures of the flowers.  Today’s photo caught my attention as the golden sunflower sat in beautiful contrast to the blue and white sky behind it.  As I was ready to take the picture, I noticed a bee coming in to see if there was some nectar it could collect.  I suspect that far too often we try so hard to blend in with our culture that the true beauty that God created us to have no longer stands out.  I know I don’t like to be noticed for being different, but I also recognize that it is through the unique way God has created me that I have the ability to do many of the things that help others see Him in me.  To hide those characteristics so that I fit in with others may be more acceptable, but it wouldn’t really bring the satisfaction of being who God created me to be.

After lunch, I played some computer games and eventually took a nap.  The rest felt good and helped me to focus on the sermon which has been simmering in my mind all day.  I’m privileged to be able to preach tomorrow morning at the North Wayne Mennonite Church and will  be sharing another sermon in a series on Living as the Lord’s Servant.  The message for tomorrow will look at the life of Barnabas and focus on “Serving with a GIVER”S Heart”.

As I reflect on the day, here are some thoughts/lessons that stand out to me:

• When you find yourself in need of physical rest, it is likely not the only type of rest you are short on.
• For me, writing is a good way to process a day’s activities as it often helps me to see more clearly what the day involved.
• Some parts of my memory tends to fade with the passing of time while other parts become more vivid.   I need to learn to hold onto the good parts and allow the troubling parts to fade.
• Some things look impossible, such as hummingbirds and bumblebees hovering in mid-air, but they are always possible when it is what God created them to do.
• God created us to shine like stars in a universe of darkness.  We cannot do that if we try to imitate the darkness.
• Being unique can be difficult and lonely but that isn’t nearly as tragic as not being who God created you to be
• God wants us to serve with a giver’s heart in all that we do.

Page 216 was filled with a variety of work . . . so full, in fact, that I’m writing the page the next morning.  The day began with a middle of the night storm rolling through that caused our power to flicker and woke Susan.  The storm seemed to pass rather quickly, but it brought a lot of wind and rain with it as it went by.  After going back to sleep for a few hours, I was up and started on my workday.  After checking and responding to a few messages, I began the process of replacing all of the air filters in the building.  It is always interesting to see how dirty they become in a relatively short amount of time as they capture dust and who knows what else that is floating in the air.  It’s not that the air looks dirty before it reaches the filter, nor does it look cleaner after the filter; but the unseen particles of dirt are taken captive before they can enter the bodies of the people in the building.  Kind of reminds me of what God says His Word and His Spirit ought to be for our mind as we take every thought captive before it can soil our actions and our character.

By mid-day I had made it through the unoccupied half of the building so while there were people working in the other end of the building I took a break to do some more work on a sermon for Sunday as well as make progress on some work I began some time ago that will allow people to donate to Impact Prayer Ministry online.  Even with that option now available, it is still my prayer that the giving done to help the prayer ministry accomplish its work would be prompted by God.  It was actually the requests of individuals to be able to give in ways that are convenient for them that led to my completing this process.  It’s a find balance to me as I don’t want to people to feel pressured by me to give, but I also want people to be able to respond to God’s prompting so that I don’t rob them of the joy of giving . . . or make it so difficult to do so that they don’t.

As I finished up that task, UPS arrived with the first printing of my illustrated children’s book.  It was fun to have the early proof copies that I could give to the library in  my hometown and to my parents, but to have my first order come in is an exciting thing.  They did pack them in a rather large box that had more packing filler than books, but today’s photo is of today’s shipment.  While holding the proof copies in my hands last week made the project feel real, this first shipment makes it feel complete.

As I returned to working on the sermon, the sounds of a group of children playing ball in the hallways echoed through the building.  As the noise continued with no apparent end, I went out to remind them that the hallways were not the gymnasium.  The children responded well, but at the sound of my voice it was the adults around them that peered out from the work they were doing and gave me a look like I was the one doing something wrong.  There are so many times that I wish I could just ignore the wrong that people are doing, and the wrong that I am doing, but my mind and who I am doesn’t allow me to do that.  In the past I’ve had an elder at a church tell me I’m too honest.  He knew I was right but they didn’t want to be called out privately for a lack of integrity and doing things they had insisted they wouldn’t do.  It wasn’t that what I was saying was wrong, but that my standards of honesty and integrity were higher than they believed were reasonable expectations for them.   Anyhow, the end result whether I say anything or don’t say anything is usually some level of isolation.  If I speak up, no one wants to hear it and they find ways to avoid me.  If I don’t speak up, I withdraw from people so I don’t have to dwell in the midst of the wrong I know I can do nothing about.  I can keep busy enough working on the wrong I do without surrounding myself with situations that don’t want to change.

Eventually, the building cleared out for the day and I returned to my work of changing out the air filters.  My predecessor had made small marks in the ceiling panels where each filter would be located so they would be easier to find.  As I searched for those spots, most of them were easy to find but eventually I had two filters to replace that I hadn’t yet tracked down.  As I walked the halls looking for those elusive marks, I finally found them.  Once I knew where they were, when I came back with the ladder the marks seemed to stand out so clearly that you might wonder how I ever could have missed them.  I think sin is a lot like that in most of our lives.  It starts out as a small spot, so small that it’s hardly noticeable — certainly, we believe, not noticeable to a casual observer.  Then when God uses His Word, His Spirit, or His people to point it out, all of a sudden that small spot stands out like a splash of mud on a garment of white.  It becomes all we see and we become convinced that it is all anyone else sees.  I think that sometimes God allows our view to become exaggerated so that we are compelled to do something about the spot before it really does consume us.

After the filters were all changed, I began the cleaning and prep to get the building ready for Sunday.  As I started, my wife and daughter stopped by to help with the cleaning so that I could finish up the long day and begin a long weekend of rest.  There may be a short break in these pages in the near future as it sounds like I may be away from internet access for a few days.  I’ll try to write them in my mind, and perhaps even write them on paper (gasp) to be published later — we’ll see.

As I reflect on the day, here are some thoughts/lessons that stand out to me:

• Sometimes it is the disruptions in our life that are the most effective in getting our attention.
• Filtering the air we breathe is good.  Filtering the thoughts we allow to reside in our mind is better.
• Taking every thought captive, as God instructs us to, is a good way to filter the good from the bad.
• God wants us to do our best in everything but He also expects us to be honest in representing ourselves and the things we promote.  Sometimes we package things so they look more impressive than they are and I believe God would call that deceit.
• We will rarely think well of the person who corrects us until we are able to humble ourselves and accept the correction.
• Correction that leads to defensiveness builds a wall between people.  Correction that leads to change builds a bridge.
• Some sin is not obvious until it is pointed out.  Once we’re aware of it, it is often the only thing we can see.
• It is often much easier to see the sin in someone else’s life than in our own.  That is one reason having godly friends who are honest is so important so that we can be made aware of what others already know.
• Sometimes it is necessary to disconnect from a lot of things for a time in order to better connect with God and family.