Life Lessons

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Thrown Out, Left Out, or Sent Out? (part 2)

Thrown Out, Left Out, or Sent Out?

Part 2 – Left Out  

In Part One of this series of articles, I introduced the concept of three major approaches to occupational ministry change that can be seen in Biblical example and in churches today.  In part one, I wrote about the abrupt transition of being thrown out.  This is a harsh way of accomplishing change.  The short-term gains rarely, if ever, outweigh the long-term hurt, disillusion, and bitterness that forms on both sides of the “thrown out” transition.  It is not a Biblical model of how Christians ought to treat one another.  In fact, the Biblical examples of ministry changes brought about by being “thrown out”, all involve non Jesus-followers versus Jesus followers.  How has the American church culture gotten to the point that we can tell a fellow believer, based solely on our personal preferences, to “Get Out!”?

Okay, long introduction and recap simply to bring us to part 2.  A seemingly gentler approach is a ministry change brought about by being left out.  Left Out has a wide range of causes and influences and is often closely related to the ministry change method of Walk Out.  Left Out is a hard issue to address because it comes from either party, and often both parties, to a ministry change. 

A Biblical example of being left out is found in the relationships of Paul, Barnabas, and John Mark.  Let’s look at it as it is written:

“Some time later Paul said to Barnabas, ‘Let us go back and visit the believers in all the towns where we preached the word of the Lord and see how they are doing.’  Barnabas wanted to take John, also called Mark, with them, but Paul did not think it wise to take him, because he had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not continued with them in the work.  They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company.  Barnabas took Mark and sailed for Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and left, commended by the believers to the grace of the Lord.”  Acts 15:36-40

It is a familiar story.  In most cases of being left out, there are actions of betrayal and abandonment — whether real or imagined — that leave a person isolated and no longer belonging to a group he once thought he was part of.  A choosing of sides takes place, followed by a parting of ways, and then you find yourself somewhere different and unexpected — wondering why it came to this.

As I stated earlier, you rarely find Left Out without his close cousin, Walked Out.  In the text above, we see Walk Out show up more than once!  The obvious one is pointed out for us in the text.  We read that John Mark had walked out on Paul, Barnabas, and company during an earlier “missionary” trip.  The other isn’t so obvious, but Paul and Barnabas walk out on each other.  Whatever discussion that takes place between them comes to a climatic end as they part company and go their separate ways.  The striking difference between “thrown out” and “left out” is the motivation.  Thrown Out is generally motivated by anger, pride, and arrogance.  Left Out is more subtle and driven by emotions of hurt, betrayal, and isolation.

Yet in this story, we see how God was able to use the hurts of Left Out to bring about good in this ministry change.  By Barnabas insisting that John Mark go along and Paul insisting that he doesn’t, two missionary teams are developed to take the message of the gospel to a greater number of people.  Being left out hurts, but God can use that to accomplish His will when we stay surrendered to Him.  The emotions of Left Out aren’t so deep and vibrant as those of Thrown Out, so the healing and reconciliation is often easier and more complete.  That is “the rest of the story” of the text above.  As Paul is imprisoned and near the end of his life, he writes to Timothy and asks him to come and to “Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry.” (2 Timothy 4:12). 

When you find yourself entangled in the complex maze of Left Out and Walk Out, know that while it is not the best situation, God can use it for great good.  Also remember that God has reconciled us to Himself to give us the ministry of reconciliation.  I pray that you and I would be mindful of those we have left out, those who feel left out, and those who walk out.  Let us carry with us, and to them, the message of reconciliation and usefulness.

. . . next up, part 3 – Sent Out. 

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Thrown Out, Left Out, or Sent Out? (part 1)

Thrown Out, Left Out, or Sent Out?

Part 1 – Thrown Out  

These thoughts have been prompted by my recent conversations with a number of people experiencing transitions in, and out, of occupational ministry as well as reflections of my journey in ministry.

There seems to be three major approaches to occupational ministry change in churches today — thrown out, left out, or sent out.  I also see God using each of these three processes to move people into ministry where He wants them to be as I read the history of the early church in the New Testament.  I find this fascinating, because without the Biblical example of God using each of these methods to accomplish His purposes, my first reaction would be to think that only one of these approaches could be used by God effectively.  But that would limit God’s ability and sovereign nature, wouldn’t it?  To only be able to use one method would stand in stark contrast to a God who “causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose.”

Not only that, I’ve seen first hand how God has used each of these methods to move me into the “work that He has prepared in advance for me to do.”  Let’s examine more closely some Biblical and personal examples of each of these approaches and determine to do transitions in a more excellent way!

The first approach is “thrown out”.  This is the most visibly harsh of the three methods of transition.  Often, this is used out of extreme hatred and ignorance.  You have various examples of the apostles being thrown out of the synagogues by the Jewish leaders, causing them to seek out listeners to the gospel message among the Gentiles.  Their ministry location would change because of being thrown out and barred from speaking to their original audience.  The persecution that spread throughout Jerusalem is another example of this.  Believers were scattered throughout the known world, thrown out of their hometown by religious leaders intent on putting a stop to Christianity.  This was slightly more subtle than the apostles being thrown out of the synagogues, but the actions of those opposed to Christianity made it clear — “You are not welcome here any longer.”

While God used the “throwing out” of His people to accomplish a greater spread of the gospel, those doing the throwing — even the religious leaders — tended to move farther and farther away from God.  Did it break God’s heart to see His servants treated that way?  I think so.  It broke His heart to see His Son treated that way.  But His desire is not to waste the pain and rejection that is experienced, but to use it for a greater good.  The lessons learned are often slow and painful but they can be of great benefit.  The key to growth when enduring the “thrown out” style of ministry change is to allow God’s love and mercy through others to bring healing and purpose. 

Being thrown out hurts.  Whether it is a physical persecution as the early Christians faced with all of its physical harm or just a simple, “You’re fired!”, the pain is real and the rejection can be overwhelming.  When you find yourself in that position, know that God wants to make something good come out of it and Satan simply wants you to become hard and bitter.  It becomes a battle for your heart and soul and it is critical that you allow God to bring healing, peace, and forgiveness into your life.  It takes time.  There is not a quick, easy, and painless “three steps to emotional healing” that can move you from thrown out today to healed and whole tomorrow.

For me, being thrown out of a ministry was one of the hardest things I have ever had to endure.  The healing and recovery process was long and hard.  I’m not even sure when it happened, but one day I no longer saw myself as the victim in the whole process.  The real victims were the lives that went untouched because people got so wrapped up in their own agendas that the only thing spread was hurt and confusion.

This isn’t unique to occupational ministry.  Most people have felt “thrown out” at some point in their life.  They’ve been “in” and told that have to get out.  We live in a throw away society and unfortunately that attitude infects the relationships that people have with one another.  If this job, marriage, friendship, or whatever other relationship doesn’t work out, that is okay — I’ll just throw it away and get another one. 

I pray that you and I would value people the way God values us.  If anyone ever had reason, God had all the reason in the world because of our sin to throw us away.  Instead, he redeemed us — bought us for His own and adopted us as sons and daughters.  What an incredible example when we begin to feel someone is of no use to us.  Don’t throw them away, guide them to a restored life in Jesus!

. . . next up, part 2 – Left Out. 

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Look! No Hands!

Look! No Hands!A generation ago, I would often challenge myself to see how far I could ride my bicycle without using my hands.  Perhaps you have done that, or still do.

I have to admit, there was generally no good reason for why I would do that other than to say that I could.  This was most effective with an audience.  To be able to call out, “Look!  No hands!”, and have people stop what they were doing and watch.  The longer I could go, the longer they would watch.

As I thought about this week’s topic, “We Are the Body of Christ”, I couldn’t help but wonder how often we do the same thing as Christians.  We want attention, so we ride through the Christian life shouting out, “Look!  No hands!”, hoping that someone notices what we are doing and focuses their eyes and thoughts on us.  We say, “Look how impressive I am.  I don’t need the hands, or the eyes, or the feet, or whatever other part God has placed in the body.  I can do this without them and then I get all the credit.”  While not saying any of this out loud, we even go so far as to say, “I don’t even need the head.  I’ve got this all figured out on my own!”

We do it even though we know what eventually comes next.  I never could succesfully finish a “no-handed” bike ride without using my hands.  While I could ride long distances, eventually I had to choose.  Do I give in and use my hands or do I crash?  The conclusion for that is the same as for life — either learn to use the parts of the body God has put into place or we crash!  As hard as we try, we eventually reach a point where we must allow the head to control all of the parts of the body for the good of the entire body.  If we fail to do that, a crash is on its way.

How often does pride get in our way and keep us from being a body where “each member does its part”?  How much do we limit ourselves as the “body of Christ” because we refuse to allow each part to do the work God created it to do?  What will it take to bring complete surrender to the headship of Christ so that each part of the body receives accurate instructions and accomplishes them effectively as part of a healthy body?  Why is it that even in the church we struggle getting past our desire to be seen and noticed when we know it is Jesus who ought to be evident in our assembly?

I pray that as the body of Christ, you and I would value each part as we allow and equip every member of the body to be used by God to accomplish His purpose and will.

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Don’t Let Anyone Look Down On You . . .

If there was ever a verse of scripture I would like to re-write, it would be the verse I want to discuss in today’s writing.  I’m not talking about a verse I want to change because I don’t like the conviction it brings in my life — I have a few of those and I understand my need for them.  I’m talking about a verse that often gets misused because of the way we read it as it is laid out in the English language.  Perhaps you recognize it:

“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young.”

As one who has attended many youth events, seminars, workshops, and conferences where this verse (or I should say, this portion of the verse) was used as the cornerstone for teaching and challenging youth to stand up for who they are, I often wonder how many of those teaching even knew what comes next — the rest of the verse!  When we look at the entire verse and the subsequent context, it should be obvious that the oft emphasized beginning is not really the main point Paul is trying to teach Timothy.  Let’s look at the whole thing in context.

“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity.  Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to preaching and to teaching.  Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through prophecy when the body of elders laid their hands on you.  Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress.  Watch your life and doctrine closely.  Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.”  1 Timothy 4:12-16

To me, at least, that passage has an entirely different emphasis than the popular one often taught to young people — an arrogant attitude that says, “I can do what I want and God commands you not to look down on me for it!”  That comes out of the way we often read scripture.  We read until we find a line we like and then we adopt that as our life slogan — never mind what it means in context, who has time to read the whole thing anyhow?  If you read through the entire passage, it should be clear that the emphasis is on your own actions, not on the attitude of others.  I am not suggesting that we change scripture to make me happy, but listen to how I would word verse 12: 

You must set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity so that no one has a reason to look down on you because of your youthfulness.  1 Timothy 4:12 – Tom’s Paraphrase

That is what Paul is getting at.  It is not a command that you somehow force people to not look down on you.  It is instruction on how to live so that no one has an excuse to look down on you.  Those five areas — speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity — are often the main areas that a young person, and a not so young person, will stumble in.  That stumbling does not grant a person the right to look down on you, but it does often give them the excuse to.  When we commit to excelling in those areas, and any other area that exemplifies Christ, then the accusations, put-downs, and disdain have no merit and no reason to stick to us.

When you feel that people look down on you for whatever reason — it doesn’t have to be youthfulness — it is time for a self-examination.  Are you contributing to their attitude about you?  Are you setting an example that is visible in all areas of Christ-likeness?  “Don’t let anyone look down on you” is a great statement if it is used for yourself as a challenge to be an example above reproach.  For me, it is similar to the command, “as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”  I think that instruction from Romans 12 and this verse from 1 Timothy are all about how we ought to live and respond to others, not a mandate on how I dictate the attitude they must have toward me.

I pray that your life and my life are lived as an example.  An example that gives no one an excuse to look down on either of us.

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Follow Me Heart and Soul

I am not a good follower.

That is a hard thing to admit, but it is true.  I have too many questions.  I’ve been described as “needing to have all my ducks in a row” before I act.  I want to calculate all possibilities and be prepared for anything.  I want no surprises that had not been anticipated and thought through.

That is why it is so easy for me to follow God!  Yes, there are times that I have my doubts and can’t see clearly, but I know that nothing catches God by surprise.  I have confidence and faith in His ability to see yesterday, today, and tomorrow with the same degree of clarity.  I have complete trust that if I listen to and obey Him completely, that He has my best interest in mind and each circumstance that I face while in obedience to Him is designed to “prosper not harm” me — even when I don’t see how at the moment.

As I think about this week’s study topic, “God Says I Am An Example”, I have to wonder how I’m doing at instilling that same faith and confidence in others as they watch me.  Do people see me following God so closely that they wouldn’t hesitate to follow me?  Does my leading show the same love, care, and concern for the welfare of others that God’s leading of me shows?

Monday’s text was taken from 1 Samuel 14 where we find the nation of Israel in dire straights.  Israel’s army consisted of 600 men with two swords between them facing the Philistine army who had been oppressing the Israelites for quite some time.  It is at this time that Jonathan, who has one of the two swords, decides something needs to be done.  The cat and mouse game of being teased and destroyed needed to end.

So, Jonathan makes a decision to go over to the enemy outpost and asks his armor-bearer to go with him — an armor-bearer without a sword!  Jonathan’s reasoning is quite simple and full of faith.  “Perhaps the Lord will act in our behalf.  Nothing can hinder the Lord from saving, whether by many or by few.”  This is where it gets hard for me.  It’s one thing for Jonathon to trust God and follow His leading.  It is another thing entirely for the armor-bearer to trust Jonathon and follow his leading.  I would be thinking, “Did you say ‘Perhaps!’?”  But that is just what he does.  I think his response says a lot more than first meets the eye.  He says, “Do all that you have in mind.  I am with you heart and soul.”  The outcome is incredible.  The two of them kill twenty of the enemy and it begins a panic that overcomes the entire Philistine army — “a panic sent by God”.  Victory is won because Jonathon follows God and says to his armor-bearer, “Follow me”.

“I am with you heart and soul” speaks deeply into how Jonathon could say, “Follow me,” and get a positive response from his armor-bearer.  The armor-bearer knew that Jonathon’s heart and soul was pursuing God.  God says that you and I are an example to others.  Our life calls out to people, “follow me”.  What kind of response we get often depends on what kind of life we are living.  I must constantly examine myself and see if I am living a life that “heart and soul” belongs to God.  If I am following Him “heart and soul”, then logic would say that someone following me “heart and soul” would actually be following God “heart and soul” because that is what they are seeing in me.

I am an example!  Am I a good example or bad?  That depends on what I am pursuing with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength.  If that sounds familiar, it should.  God says all of that — all of me — belongs to Him. 

I pray that as you and I live life, our example is pure because it flows from our heart and soul belonging completely to God.

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Wow! I Love God! (and I still enjoy flying!)

For those who have read my previous post and travel a lot by air, you probably knew this article would be coming!

My four hour layover in Denver turned into a six hour layover and two hour late arrival in Tucson.  Shortly before noon, the monitors were listing a one hour delay due to the airplane we were to use being delayed in arriving to Denver.  The plane did arrive and the crew boarded and did their pre-flight checks to get ready for our flight.  Then we were told the flight was simply being listed as delayed, with no estimated departure time due to a problem with one of the doors.  I  guess there is something about flying for 2 hours without a door that might become worrisome.

Pretty soon, the crew come up the jet-way and simply said they were told to leave the aircraft — not a good sign if you plan on flying soon.  But it wasn’t long before they made an announcement that our aircraft needed work but they had another plane at a different gate that we would be using with a 3:00 scheduled departure rather than the 1:20 original flight plan.  Fortunately, the new gate wasn’t far and the crowd of fellow fliers make their way over and reshuffle the line.  Then the announcement is made that this aircraft is configured differently and it doesn’t have as many seats.  Seating on this plane would be rows 4 – 19.  Anyone ticketed in something other than that would not be going!  I had seat 4A, so I was good to go.  Then it was as if they forgot to tell the crew about the new plans.  They finally arrived and we made it on the plane and ready to go for a 3:20 departure.

Such is the life of flying!  Good one minute, completely gone wrong the next.  But as I said to a gentleman in line with me, “Still beats walking!”  I made it from South Bend to Tucson in 15 hours from the time I left home to driving away from the Tucson airport.  Yes, it could have been a quicker trip.  Yes, it is generally more enjoyable when everything goes right.

But, it wasn’t my day.  I’m not saying it wasn’t my day because things went wrong.  That would be the common line of thinking — you’ve heard it, right?  When everything goes just right, it must be my day.  When everything goes wrong, it just wasn’t my day.  That is not what I’m saying.  It wasn’t my day because it was God’s day that I am living.  I love the line from the “Facing The Giants” movie, “We praise Him if we win and we praise Him if we lose.”  That is what I’m talking about.  I love God and His day was given to me in a way not according to my plans.  That’s okay!

I love God and I still enjoy flying because I attempt to fly in obedience to God’s calling in my life.  I don’t simply plan trips because they sound like fun or will be of great benefit or rest to me.  I go places based on my listening to God and his promptings in my life through His Spirit, His Word, and the people around me.  I’m sure I don’t hear as well as I ought, but I travel in faith that God has ordained each step I take.  He already knows the steps I take in obedience and the steps I take in disobedience, and every step in between. 

I love God because my life with Him is an eventful journey that is a lot like flying.  I listen, I plan, and I anticipate, but ultimately He’s in charge and I’m learning to joyfully be obedient to His instructions and changes, even if they appear to me as 2 hour delays in my schedule.  His decisions are always right and always for my ultimate good. 

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I Love Flying!

I’m sitting in the airport at Denver, Colorado and they have free WiFi access.  It would be nice if all airports had this feature.  I left South Bend, Indiana early this morning, stopping through Chicago’s O’Hare airport before arriving here in Denver on my way to Tucson.  South Bend and O’Hare both charge for their WiFi access, something like $7 a day — how many ways can you say, “rip-off”!

 Anyhow, even with that side-note, I love flying!  Today has gone great so far.  My flights have been on-time departures and early arrivals.  I had 2 hours in Chicago and 4 hours here in Denver.  Many people read that and think that’s terrible.  Six hours simply sitting in airports waiting to get to a destination.  I don’t see it that way.  I guess that is part of why I love flying.  I even love flying when things go wrong and the schedule isn’t working.  Well, most of the time at least.  There has been an occasion when I really needed to be somewhere else according to a schedule I couldn’t control.  That was a little frustrating, but not normal for me.

I think a lot of it is because of the work and ministry God has called me to.  I see my time as God’s.  He knows before I ever book my flights what the trip will be like. He knows how I can use the time He gives me to either draw closer to Him or be His servant to other people.  The question each time, is what will I actually do?  It is fun to simply walk through the airport smiling!  People evidently aren’t used to that.  I nearly always get a visible response, as well as a verbal greeting from airport employees when they see me smiling.  Many of my fellow travelers will extend a warm greeting — or look around them to see what they must have missed. 🙂

It feels good to be a messenger of cheer.  Most young children have almost always felt an instant connection to me.  I don’t know why.  Maybe they recognize that I am closer to their level in a lot of ways than what most other adults are.  Maybe it’s just the fact that I look goofy!  I don’t think that many of them have anyone smile at them while they travel.

As I sat here in the airport reflecting on that one thought, “I Love Flying!”, I wondered why that is so easy to say?  For me, it really does have little to do with the ease or smoothness of the process.  Yes, that is helpful and very much enjoyed, but it is not required.  Our study theme this week has been, “I Am A Lover of God”.  As I thought about my reaction to walking through the airport, I wondered if I’m that quick to walk through life smiling because I love God. 

I Love God!  That ought to be so much above and beyond the simple statement, “I love flying”, but I’m not sure it always is.  Does my love of God reflect in the life I live?  What would the people I cross paths with each day think?  Do I bring joy and comfort to their life as an outpouring of my love of God?  Does my life look differently when the daily journey goes according to schedule, compared to the days when everything is delayed, behind schedule, and a general mess?  When my life is going like I think it ought to, do I wake up and think, “Wow!  I love God!”  When life is a struggle and and makes little or no sense, can I still wake up and say, “Wow!  I love God!” 

I think that is the start of a lesson God is teaching me today.  It is easy to see some of what God is doing in and through me as I travel and that result of God at work is why I say, “I love flying” or “I love driving”.  If it wasn’t for the work God is doing as I fly or drive somewhere, I don’t really think I would like it all that much.  God is saying to me, “You really don’t love flying, you love Me!” 

And I say, “I Do!”

I am a lover of God!

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All Or Nothing!

This week’s study in the Deer Run “View From The Top: What Does God Say?” series is, “God Says I Am A Lover of God”.

Our texts that we are using for daily reflection and discussion have been great, but here it is Friday and I’ve not yet written about any of them.  If I could blame my schedule, or simply the fact that I am having a hard time re-establishing the habit of writing, it would be easier.  It goes deeper than that.  I’ve sat down at the computer each day as I’ve gone through the daily scriptures and questions, thinking I would write about the truths God revealed to me that day.  Yet, there I sat and nothing was written.

Each day, that question would rise in my mind, “Why haven’t you written?”  I couldn’t answer it.  I’m still not sure.  It may be my inner desire to not write some glib words about loving God simply because that is the study topic this week.  It may be saving me from sounding hypocritical — it’s easy to write about loving God, but am I doing it?  It may be out of an inner wrestling of decision –does God really have all, or does He have nothing?

In the midst of it all, the words of Jesus to Peter, “Do you love me?”, kept standing out in my mind throughout the week.  My answer sounds so Peter-like, “Of course I do!”  And God’s response sounds so Jesus-like, “Then do something about it!” 

Do something!  Do what?

“Feed My lambs.  Take care of my sheep.”

But, I love You!  I don’t particularly like your lambs.  Your sheep — well, they actually scare me.

“So what?  You can’t do the greatest command, love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and not do the second — love your neighbor as yourself.”

And then it hit me.  It’s the all or nothing dilemma.  All is so inclusive and exclusive that it leaves nothing out.  I can’t love God with ALL my heart and still have something else taking part of it.  All doesn’t leave room for other things.  All requires absolutely everything — nothing is left out, excluded, or hidden.

So, what about the sheep?  If I love God with the “all” kind of love, there is nothing left for the sheep?  No.  What is left for the sheep is God’s love in and through us.  That is the second greatest command, “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  It is given in conjunction with the greatest command to Love God with ALL.  When God doesn’t simply have first place, He has the only place in my heart, mind, soul, and strength, then the love required to care for His sheep cannot be mine — mine is all given to God.  It must be His!  It is His love that rejoices, cares, cries, ministers, and serves the people around  me.  It is not even the overflow of my love for Him.  That still all belongs to Him.  It is the overflowing grace and mercy of His love for me that is to be poured into the lives of others.

It is all or nothing.  If I don’t love God with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength, I will not experience the fullness of God’s love to express to my neighbor.  If God doesn’t have the “all” of my love, the sheep get left out because I’m tired, selfish, greedy, uncaring, poor, or busy.  True love — God’s love — can only flow accurately from me and be expressed to others if He is all I love.  If I don’t love God with “all”, then the people around me end up with nothing because personally I’m bankrupt in the love department.

I pray that God has my all and your all.  May we hold nothing back so that His love and His Spirit can completely fill all the rooms, corners, and hidden areas of our life.  I am a lover of God.  God, help me to be a faithful lover of you.